Saturday, April 14, 2007

Revised Definition

Redefining “Love at first sight” in the internet era

Here’s the definition from Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia, about “Love at first sight“ :

“Love at first sight is when a person feels romantic passion for a complete stranger upon his or her initial encounter with the stranger. The term can be used casually to refer to a mere sexual attraction or crush, but it usually refers to actually falling in love with someone literally the very first time one sees him or her, along with the deep desire to have an intimate relationship with that person. The stranger may or may not be aware that the other person has any such notion, and may not even be aware of the other person's presence (such as in a crowded place). Sometimes two people experience this phenomenon towards each other at the same time, usually when their eyes meet. See also love.”

So- with fewer words:
Love at first sight is the romantic passion for a complete stranger upon his or her initial encounter with the stranger. Falling in love the very first time one sees him or her.

Initial encounter –in this day and age of communication and internet – initial encounter is rarely in person and it’s done trough emails, instant and text messages, posting blogs and profiles on My Space, sharing pictures.

Not that we wouldn't prefer to meet someone in person but we're too busy and we run in the same circle all day. Circle of friends, coworkers, relatives or schoolmates. If we exhausted those circles of posibillities and the special someone is not in sight what alternatives we have?

Go outside of the above mentioned circles. Go to gym, library, mall, shopping, club, bar or dance club. What's the chance you will meet your ideal partner in any of those places. Let's face it, if we're single - we go to clubs to hook up - we don't expect to marry someone who we meet there. There are exceptions of course but the general rule is that we rarely meet our significant other while we wait in line at the retail store.

What's to be done than? Hmm...you got it. The internet. From the convenience of your home you can find your time to write an email, send a message or share a picture. In short - get to know somebody else.

Some might say that there are many people online that are lying about themselves and posing something they're not. The same people that do that in real life - will do it online. And vice versa. Yes, it's easier to lie someone in an email than lookig them in the face, but that applies only to liars - honest people will behave the same either online or in real life.
And we're talking now about them. People that are hoping there is someone special for them too. Just they didn't found yet that special someone. But they do have hope.
So - we're going online.

Online we’re much more relaxed and confident in ourselves. Being in contact – without being in physical range - we express ourselves more clearly and we speak our minds more often than not.

Beauty and in general physical aspect comes and goes. Personality is rarely changing. If you don’t like and match someone’s personality traits – don’t even think about how hot and sexy they look. If you will insist to get into a relationship with them - you’ll get an Mylar balloon. Shiny and empty - and that will fly up and away from you the first time you let them go from your hand.

On the other hand think of someone truly remarkable that you’ve met online. You exchanged mails and messages, pictures and comments. Think of the laughter, conversation, affinities, hobbies or preferences that you share with that stranger (that’s really a stranger - because you never met in person).

That’s your initial encounter where you could “fall in love of the first sight” – before actually meeting them.
Than - when you actually meet in person – the initial feeling could be reinforced by their physical aspect and by their body language and actually their live personality.

If they have the personality you’ve expected, or if they actually are even more charming in person but they don’t look so hot as you pictured them –does it make a difference for you? Be sincere – I think it won’t matter.
You will adjust the picture you’ve had in your head – with their actual appearance and you’ll continue to fall in love even faster.

Actually when you meet someone in person after you’ve met them online -that’s the second time you’re around that person. You already know some of their personality and you like it.
The likelihood to fall in love right there at your first meet in person is tenfold.

Maybe I’m stupid but I actually think you can love at first sight, even before having the first sight.

With that said I’d like to propose the revised definition:

“Love at first sight” is the romantic passion for a complete stranger upon his or her initial encounter with the stranger. The encounter is not necessary to be in person and could be any form of of interaction between the two.

1 comment:

Kahnee said...

I think that is a good revised definition.